When a Man Loves

•A man shows love through actions and Behaviour such as:

#protecting and providing for their partner,

#showing  commitment beyond affection 

#prioritizing his partner’s  needs, mental well-being and the Relationship

#Engaging their partner in their plans

#Active listening,  

# Flexibility and allowing himself to be emotionally available and present; expressing it through

consistent emotional support. Actions and Behaviour

Protects and Provides Emotional Support:  consistently present, available, especially during difficult times, and going out of his way to help or make them feel supported, not alone and ensuring safety and comfort.

Consistent Affection: providing physical and emotional affection, creating a sense of safety, assurance and comfort through touches and messages that  say; I care, am here when you need me, also depending on their understanding of their partner's love language e.g from gifting, touching, hugs, quality time together, validation and noticing their partner's emotions.

Prioritizes the Partner’s Needs and the Relationship: not friends, Sunday soccer, Moraka, and his ego etc. and when their is conflict, he actively works quickly to resolve it than sulk for hours, weeks and months as he values his partner and considers the relationship more important than being right or winning arguments.

Common Shared Future: he includes his partner in his plans, shares his ideas and allows the partner to have an input, and genuinely values the partner's perspective, therefore, he will not go out of his way to initiate or implement projects without engaging the person he loves. As a result, the "me'' or "I" becomes "we" , “Us” or “Our”,

Emotional and Verbal Expression

• Active listening: listens attentively whilst maintaining eye contact, paying attention to details to remember things that are important to the partner and shows genuine interest in his partner's views, thoughts and emotions.

• Values their Partner's Opinions and Happiness: this will be evident in the interest showed in their partner's life; who their friends are, members of their family, keen to know their hobbies, what makes them laugh, smile, happy or sad, because"he cares about what his partner cares about".

• Confidence in their Partner's Abilities : he shows his confidence in the partner’s potential and encourages them to fly their wings, supports them and inspires the partner when feeling demotivated. 

• Vulnerability: removes his emotional walls, the male "ego" or macho attitudes to facilitate free disclosure of his fears, anxieties, and insecurities , and that shows that he is human and also has feelings. Doing that creates emotional connection between him and his partner and strengthens the relationship than weaken it.

Body Language and Honest Communication

• He consistently maintains eye contact and gives warm smiles; frequent eye contact and warm smiles re-assures the partner of the attention, love and emotional presence.

•Close Proximity; the physical closeness maintained when sitted or walking in public places, face-to face sitting or placing his arm around the partner, etc sends a clear message of security and protection from harm and from strangers, whilst at the same time, demonstrates intimacy and affection through hand touches and other protective gestures.

•Honesty and Authentic Communication: is demonstrated through being keen to have conversations about the partner’s feelings, his feelings and prioritises his partner’s needs, hence, always enquiring through questions such as :

"Are you okay?"

"Can I do something for you?"

"What can i do to help?"

"How are you feeling?",

"How was work?"

"Is everything okay?"

“Do you need help with anything?”

# He will not give his phone more attention whilst ignoring his partner, the phone will play second fiddle, and office calls will wait whilst he showers his partner with all the attention they deserve.

As a result, it becomes easy for the partner to reciprocate with more affection and attention because “we teach people how to treat us”, by the way we treat them. Therefore, he treats his partner with love, and hence it’s common for the partner to respond with a double portion of love ; “love begets love”. Love attracts love, compassion attracts compassion and most importantly self-love enables people to share the love they have within back to the one who shower them with love. Remember: You can never share what you do not have, so, self-love and self-acceptance enables us to freely share ourselves with others just as we are.

https://youtu.be/im6HHVuwYY0

Video

What a Man Does When He Loves You